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For a while, I faked enjoyment and tried to trick myself into liking it. I gave people who I wasn’t excited about access to my body hoping that one of them would successfully change how I felt once I was penetrated. When that didn’t happen I once again felt damaged, however then I grew to become much more determined to determine what was going on. After a couple of extra unsuccessful physician visits, I stopped and thought perhaps there was no issue. I mean, I enjoyed each different aspect of intercourse — I took cost, felt uninhibited and relaxed — until it came to penetration. When a companion and I received to that time when we have been being intimate, that’s when it went from enjoyable to deeply cringe-inducing.

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